How to call the police

HOW TO CALL THE POLICE WHEN YOU'RE OLD AND DON'T MOVE FAST ANYMORE.
George Phillips of Marsh Green, Wigan was going up to bed when his wife told him that he'd left the light on in the garden shed, which she could see from the bedroom window.

George opened the back door to go turn off the light but saw that there were people in the shed stealing things.
He phoned the police, who asked 'Is someone in your house?' and he said 'no'. Then they said that all patrols were busy, and that he should simply lock his door and an officer would be along when available. George said, 'Okay,' hung up, counted to 30, and phoned the police again.

'Hello, I just called you a few seconds ago because there were people stealing things from my shed. Well, you don't have to worry about them now because I've just shot them.' Then he hung up.

Within five minutes three police cars, an Armed Response Unit, and an ambulance showed up at the Phillips' residence and caught the burglars red-handed.

One of the Policemen said to George: 'I thought you said that you'd shot them!'
George said, 'I thought you said there was nobody available!'

I LOVE IT - Don't mess with old people!!

i love it.....

Superb. lol

What a joke the police are these days.

this is exactly true of lincoln police

I am fortunate enough that I live exactly opposite the Goldsmith kids favourite 'sit on' wall therefore I see my policemen a lot. lol (sorry I of course meant community support officer)

Maybe he (they) could advise them on the practive of putting crisp packets/drinks cans&bottles/sweet wrappers in bins rather than throwing them in my front garden!!!

AC

community support officers are a waste of space or at least the ones on this estate are we have one who thinks he is Hitler

I used to work at an old ladies clothes shop in town, at christmas there was always lots of purse stealing going on in the store, i remember this one old ducky came up to me, really upset because she had her purse stolen whilst in the shop, so i rang the cops and they said sorry we cannot come over, we have no policemen in town.....this was a saturday afternoon for gods sake!!!

And I'm furious with a certain pc from Boston, as we had a car crash a couple of weeks ago, and even though the lady that crashed into us had been at a party all afternoon, she was not breathalised.

I think its slackness that really lets the side down, theres a lot of good people who are policemen that do such good work, but they get let down by the rest.

Plus there is so much red tape now days they have to spend half their time doing data entry